Musings on the Ego...

It's always interesting how well timed signposts are in appearing if we are aware of them...

Here I am quite happy with how my acceptance learning is going, and in the space of a phone call I become aware just how much ego is still involved and how there are still little things the acceptance isn't 'honest' in yet... Nice thing is I have become aware of it without feeling a negative attachment to it, so I can now add that to the list of things to be 'conscious' about to ensure that I catch the ego before it does its little digs, before it makes its oh so subtle judgments, so all good! Onwards and upwards and glad to know I'm not the only one going to benefit from me becoming aware of this!


So rolling on from there I guess tonight will see me musing about ego and how I notice mine, how I deal with mine when I'm aware of it or made aware of it and how crafty I've noticed it can be trying to slide on in there!

Ego! Gotta love it! It gives us our identity, it ensures we have enough individuality that once we return to the Source, to 'God' that we aren't simply swallowed by the infiniteness of it, but are able to maintain that separate, or individual consciousness within that.... through our experiences, our learning, our personalities, our egos we are able to keep that sense of 'self' once we are returned to the Whole. That's my take on it anyway! So in that respect it's all good! I know I'm a part of the whole, a part of the infinite but the ego in me is more than happy to hear that all that I go through here, all that I "am" here won't just disappear once it's finished, I won't be a single drop of water, swallowed in the infinite ocean and diluted until you can't find that one drop again afterwards, I'll be a single drop that is aware it is a drop in an ocean and thus hold itself as complete within the completeness!

However what was to serve a purpose AFTER this life, has taken us over in this life, what should be a valuable tool, so that we can experience a sense of self outside of the all encompassing Source, has mutated somewhat through our own allowance of it to a wee monster who does not want to give up that individuality again! Ego is fear of being swallowed by the whole and losing its sense of self, so it fights, sometimes tooth and nail to maintain it's sense of individuality... if you're Aquarius like me you can see it in the contrary nature, where we will take the opposite stance to anyone, no matter whether it is what we believe or not, just to be different LOL.

Ego is the "I'm right and I'm different to you so you must be wrong", ego is the "I'm better and bigger and stronger than you, because then YOU might get swallowed by the ocean, but I'll have a chance of surviving", ego is fear.

Now Eckhart Tolle has a fantastically simple way of dealing with the ego and that is to simply be aware of it, to watch it. Of course you have to recognise it first right? To start with it's pretty simple to recognise, you'll be stunned once you start looking at how UNsubtle it is! But once you become more aware of it, once you start taming it, you may be quite surprised at what a fast learner it is! It becomes very subtle, it sneaks in under the disguise of a motive of Love until somehow your attention is brought to the fact that the motive of Love has a judgment attached, or a slightly superior attitude, or a gloating, or any other number of emotions that when stripped back bring it back to an ego based "I will survive" type of emotion. Sneaky little buggers they are!

So tonight I was made aware of my more subtle ego still playing its games, which is lovely because now I'm aware, I can watch it again, observe it and settle it back down like a fussing baby when it should be sleeping!

It is very much easiest when starting out to think of the ego as a separate identity, then you don't get pulled into the guilt or the blame game, where you judge yourself for 'not knowing better' for failing to recognise it etc etc, all just more ego based pain/fear based stuff.

I guess for me personally it helps to work on leaving judgments behind when I remind myself that 'God', the infinite Source of everything is a very pure, very unconditional, very neutral Love. That Love that will sit back and let you make your own mistakes, it will not try to protect, it will not judge, but it simply allows you to be, and that includes making and learning from our 'mistakes'. So if EVERYTHING is made up completely and utterly from the energy that is Love, then nothing can be judged as bad or wrong can it! It may be vibrating at a different frequency, we may perceive it as a negative for whatever reason, but ultimately it is a manifested form of Love, so it cannot possibly be "bad". That would go for the ego too then right? The ego is not bad. The ego is not out to get us or those around us, the ego is simply a form of Love that is vibrating at a slightly different frequency now, and is out of synch. Much like the Laws of Gravity, a bigger object with attract a smaller object, subjecting a little Love to a BIGGER Love will bring that little Love up in frequency until it is back in synch, so we subject the ego to the light of Awareness, the presense of Love, to 'God' if you can accept that term. We watch it, without judging, we simply observe it and observe in it the Awareness, the Love. Like alchemy it transmutes from a base metal, from a common sludge, to the purest gold, more precious than anything, bringing great value and worth with it. The Ego is a part of who and what we are, we don't want to cast it out, we don't want to destroy it! It is us! But we want to make a fine wine from it instead of it being the vinegar it is when it tries to process itself without Love.

So my ego tonight was found to be a judgmental one and on more than one level! My ego wanted someone to have reasons for doing something that fitted MY perception of what was 'right', I was judging not only them (or rather wanting to not be able to judge them because they conformed to what I wanted!) but I was judging MY reasons as the best ones, lets face it, I am of course, always right!!! (Aquarius remember?! LOL) I now have to consciously be aware of the ego, because although the reasons behind it are ultimately seen (by me!) as good ones, wanting someone to be the best they can be, they are still judging and setting people up for failure, and setting myself up to be disallusioned when they can't live up to my expectations! I, without ego, can and will accept their reasons as THEIR reasons, I accept their journey as not identical to mine even though they may be similar, I accept that I can control only one thing and that is myself and my thoughts and my Love, and that when I can control that there is no NEED to control anything else, all else is free to 'be'... so I turn my awareness to the voice in my head, the one that justifies, the one that makes excuses, the one that tries to place blame, the voice that is fear and pain based, and I watch that voice, I watch it with Love, that is the "me" part of the "I Am", that needy little voice is the Kelley-Anne part of this Being, and with a bit of careful observation, and with a lot of awareness, that part of me will be serene, that part of me will be at Peace, that part of me will be Love with a sense of self and will no longer be able to or try to hurt others or myself to protect it's identity.

I have no doubt my ego hasn't finished teaching me yet, I get the feeling we're not quite out of the common sludge stage just yet! But we are progressing, I am no longer unconsciously letting it run my life and cause me the pain and misery it has in the past. I'm no longer unconsciously letting it sabotage myself or those that I love, I no longer honour the ego by buying into the past or the future... all I truly have is right now, this very moment, and I will honour that as the only truth I have. What I say right NOW makes a difference, what I do right NOW is important, because anything else is pure illusion, is simply either no longer exists or has not yet existed! It is all illusion outside of this one glorious moment, each Now contains within it the infinite, each Now has the potential to be ANYTHING, do you honour that potential or wish it away for the illusion of a future or a memory of the past and buy into the ego....?

Musings on Acceptance...

A quiet nightshift is a good time to contemplate things, or just get going in the Now and NOT think... I find I usually do a long winded email that is definitely a contemplation thing so thought I'd actually jot down some thoughts as just that this time, rather than directing them at a particular person for a particular reason. Problem is what to muse over! So many topics, so few hours and still work to be done, so lets pick a relatively simple one... Acceptance...

I guess to me acceptance is just letting something "be" and to be honest it is a pretty new lesson learnt or being learnt for me. Funny though, I can't actually pinpoint what if anything stirred up that learning! However I do know I've gone from impatient, fighting what is happening, worrying, living in fear of an unknown future, made even more precarious because someone else is involved and we all know you can't control someone else, feeling like I was going mad, in the grips of ego, pain body and god knows what else, to like having a switch flicked, and simply flipping over to accepting what will be will be, accepting that I can't control time, others, and to a huge extent what happens around me, the only given is I can control what happens within me. I can control MY attitudes, I can control my reactions, my actions, my thoughts and my feelings. And although I use the word "control" here, I haven't had to 'control' anything, that acceptance has come so peacefully, there is nothing left to control. Things may still be uncertain, but it no longer matters. In fact I feel rather neutral about everything, there are no highs or lows, no real good or bad, everything just 'is'. To be honest it feels so neutral I get the feeling I'm either missing something or not doing it right! LOL. Having said that it is a lot nicer to live daily here than with the pain body and ego that was in control only a matter of a couple of weeks ago!

I'm not sure if internally I could describe it as being at "peace", there is still enough uncertainty around things that although it doesn't really bring me disquiet, it lurks. At times I feel like I am about to get nervous butterflies, I realise that and realise it's the uncertainty factor, so ego and a fear of the future. As I realise this it dissolves away again to this very neutral state of acceptance again, which although lovely feels like there is something missing. I'm expecting acceptance to come with a positive 'emotion' rather than a lack of any emotion I suppose, but hey! Early days and I'm sure if I stop and examine what is going on inside the Peace and Joy are still there, like the sun behind the clouds, it's just that I'm not recognising them at the moment.

So the lack of 'positives' aside, this feeling has given me a lot of freedom! Every moment is participated in. I may prefer to be in bed and sound asleep, but I'm not and that NOT being where I'd prefer doesn't bring me any negative feelings or thoughts at all. I'm here, I'll make the most of it. I'll enjoy the music playing in the restaurant, enjoy some time to contemplate, I'll get my work done and be ready to greet the new morning with a tired smile.

Funny thing is I keep expecting this feeling to fade, to disappear, that the impatience, and negatives will make there way back in, so far so good, they haven't! I guess being aware of what I've found serves very simply to keep it in place. If I hadn't recognised what it was perhaps the ego and pain body would have had an easier time sliding back in past it, but that awareness, that recognition of it serves to keep my attention on it and it holds in place that much stronger.

It's funny how others perceive things though. I had a comment made to me today (after no sleep last night) that I will think my judgments are OK when they're not due to the lack of sleep. I had to stop and examine what I thought of that for a second, and realised very calmly that no, I'm quite aware that I'm sleep deprived, quite aware of what that means in terms of driving, working, functioning, but that there is nothing I can do about it and I will continue to function until it can be rectified. It did make me aware that the acceptance I have found is far reaching. I took nothing personal from the implication that my ego would convince me I was 10 foot tall and bullet proof. I took no offence at an imagined slight (which, heck a month ago, if I was sleep deprived I sure would have!) I was simply aware that others perceived me differently to how things actually were. Judgments... I guess that's it isn't it... with acceptance there are no judgments, not for anyone else and not for yourself. Oh sure, I catch myself thinking a half formed thought that is ego laiden, but I am tending to catch them before they are completely formed, or thought about, or spoken out loud, or acted on, and hey presto, just like that as soon as they are observed for what they are (ego!) they just dissolve away again!

Amazing how simply it works, but what triggered it?! I do pride myself on "learning" but this almost feels like someone helped me cheat and get the answer without figuring out how to get there! Not that I'm complaining, just somehow feels like I've taken a short cut! I guess in reality there is no reason why I can't work backwards, from this state of being and do my learning that way, besides I still need to dig into it and find the positives rather than abide in this neutrality, which is sure helping and serving a purpose, but it does feel like something is missing.... or is that just a trick of ego too? "There must be something better than this!" ego, never satisfied LOL. Actually having reread this I can pinpoint when it happened, and it was actually a time when I described it as having "the rose coloured glasses taken off" in relation to how I perceived someone else. Oh, I know in truth what they are, they are God! I know in truth too, that although I can see that God Force in them so strongly that they are still human, still have ego involved, still learning their own lessons just as I am mine, but I really SAW it a couple of weeks ago, and at the time a couple of things said I allowed to hurt me, but when I sat down on a night shift and did my contemplation email and examined what had happened and how that made me feel etc, I realised then that everything had changed, like with a snap of the fingers, in the process of examining it within me and typing it out to share it, that switch was somehow flicked.

I guess I'm happy to report that there have been little tests for this acceptance too, just little day to day things, conversations, situations, sleep deprivation LOL. Nothing has been able to ruffle my feathers, nothing has caused me fear or anger, rather I can look at it all very impartially and realise what I can or want to contribute and then put it forward if it is warranted. I feel very zen like :o)

One thing it does make me very aware of is just how many judgments are made by others, nearly everything we say or do is some type of judgment, either that someone else is wrong, or if agreeing with us, then right, either way it is judgment which of course occurs because we see ourselves as separate from that which is around us. But that is a whole different topic perhaps for tomorrow night. Although I could quite happily disappear off onto tangent after tangent I have to abide by clock time and do some work too! Although it is exciting to just get out what is in my head, to examine it, to perhaps learn something more about it just by the act of observing it enough to describe it, I do run the risk of getting carried away by it and ignoring my other responsibilities.

So for now, I will accept I should save this and go and do some of my duties and if I have time later, perhaps a tangent can be entertained then.

Before I go though, I have just found a couple of quotes on Acceptance that ring true and one of them perhaps describes what I think I'm feeling! "Serenity comes when you trade expectations for acceptance" (Unknown author) and that I guess is it! Serenity, no desire to change anything, 'Unaffected by disturbance; calm and unruffled' that is a good adjective I think for how I feel :o) The other quote is "The first step toward change is awareness. The second step is acceptance." by Nathaniel Branden, and this too is true from what I've noticed in myself... once the awareness or recognition of something is there the battle is won.

Gosh the tangent of separateness could really just be called Ego couldn't it, and that is a mighty big tangent and my brain is getting more and more fuzzy so instead I'm going to muse simply on some of the things I can sense the "Awareness" or God Force in most easily.

Funnily enough I can sense it most easily in things that aren't 'living', a desk, a truck, a road, anything inanimate because it is easy to send a little psychic tap root out and feel for that something 'extra' by way of a consciousness. If I do it to trees, plants, animals or people, I get their own personality most strongly, and it is harder to push that out of the way to get the other consciousness there. What amuses me (and possibly vice versa!) is that when I sense that awareness, that consciousness it always seems to be smiling or very nearly laughing at me!

When sensing that awareness or presence in things it is as if I've gone from watching TV to watching a 3D movie, as soon as it it perceived everything gains a depth that wasn't there previously, as if it stands out more, is more solid and "real" than previously. Very interesting to see how it is perceived.

WOW! Where did the last 3 months go?!

Time sure does fly when you are busy! So much has happened in the last 3 months, a quick over view just to catch you up and then on with the show!

Pete and I have separated, Marcus and I are still living on the property with the critters, Marcus will be 5 in 10 days time and then off to school, so I've been sourcing "work" to help pay the bills and getting ready to try to take on a mortgage to buy Pete out of the property... So I'm now doing Saturday and Sunday night shifts at a flash Hotel in town as a "Night Manager" certainly cuts into the weekend but it was very handy as Pete is having Marcus every weekend anyway and those 2 nights with collecting the eggs on the weekend is covering the bills OK.

Then I decided to go truck driving! So have done the first truck licence to drive up to 18 ton trucks, done the forklift, wheels, tracks and rollers so I can play on the machinery too, can do the next truck licence after the 18th May (so I can play on the 6 and 8 wheelers etc) and then 3 mths after that I can do the trailers licence too. I rocked on up to the local Transport company that I've had do a bit of work for me so they knew my face, asked if I could just hang out and work with the guys there and learn what I needed to learn while Marcus was just around the corner at kindy, they were fantastic enough to say yes, sent me out on my own in the truck on the 3rd day and are now paying me too, beautiful people! Go Renwick Transport Ltd! LOL. So I'm having a ball driving the trucks etc, Marcus gets to come with me some afternoons after I pick him up from kindy, he waves furiously at all the other trucks we see trying to get them all to wave back LOL. A bit short of hours at the moment, it's grape harvest time so they have a few extra drivers around and it sort of cuts into the hours I could work, but once Marcus is at school and I have the next licence I should be in a much better place to put the hours in and get the hours work that I need to be able to chuck the night shift in!

I have been actively working Eckhart Tolle's stuff and although there have been some hiccups along the way, I am learning so much and really am thrilled to bits with where my learning is right now.

The person I was discussing all the Power of Now stuff with has been a "complication" albeit a lovely one as things have developed there and I seem to have bounced from a rather empty marriage into a very full on relationship and we don't even live in the same town, can be a bit hard, but that too has forced me into some full on learning and working the Power of Now stuff so I can stay centered and grounded and all the rest of it.

Thankfully the communication work has been reasonably quiet because I've been EXHAUSTED!!!! Although I have a couple here that I need to get done NOW, although of course after only 4 hours sleep in the last 2 1/2 days it just doesn't end up happening! I refuse to short change the animals I talk to and their people by only giving it 1/2 my attention, but I must get to bed on Monday at the same time as Marcus (6pm LOL) and catch up so I can get these babies done!

So everything has changed and is still changing and life can feel a tad surreal right now.

Because the communication work has been a little quiet and I've been actively applying Eckhart Tolle's teachings I've been "communicating" more with that Presence or God Force as I've been doing it and learning to release the ego etc and last night on night shift I decided to make use of some of my time there and examine some different things that I'm working thru and just jot them down.... so for lack of anywhere else to put these musings I'm going to throw them in the blog!

And a Happy New year!

Christmas has been and gone, the tree packed up for another year, the New Year was seen in only in my dreams as I was sound asleep by then (got to make the most of the sleep, it just ain't a happening thing these days!) In fact last night by 2am I'd all but given up on the sleep thing happening and dragged a duvet out onto the balcony off the bedroom, planted the pillow on the deck and snuggled up under an exquisite star filled sky, my God, what a sight it was! By nearly 5am after almost dozing a couple of times it started getting a bit chillier so I went back inside and got maybe an hours sleep. If you're going to go without sleep a scene like that above your head makes liking awake enjoyable anyway!

Smokey has come back in from his holiday and is still my sweet wee boy who when frisky his little sewing machine trot just get faster and faster, he is just too cute!

Mac is doing well with everything too, still loving having him 'back' as such. He is my angel.

The dogs are all good altho Karma's limp has gotten worse in her front leg which really isn't good because it had no reason to get worse. She is 8 1/2 now, seems like just yesterday she was a wee 5mth old pup we saved from getting shot, I guess she is getting old! I may do the x-ray thing to see what is showing up in there...

Have really enjoyed reading both A New Earth and Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle, truly enlightening books and what a difference they've made in my life in the space of a few weeks, have met a wonderful new friend thru the books too and it's great bouncing ideas and concepts off each other, huge changes in my 'inner space' going on right now and it's very exciting! Massive energy shifts (which really isn't helping the sleep thing!)

And that's about it!

Hope you and your families are enjoying the holiday season and that the weather is being kind to you where ever you live!

Merry Christmas to all

Wow, where has this year gone? It's flown by and only speeding faster and faster, so Christmas is suddenly upon us and next it'll be 2011 :o)

Next whale watch attempt is going to be for my birthday too, fingers crossed they'll make an appearance for us end of January!

Heading to Christchurch for Christmas, I know the family will be very conscious of Mum being absent but with 4 rowdy boys running around full on all day I'm sure everyone will be distracted just a bit from the sadness which is good :o)

Pete and Marcus are going to stay down an extra couple of days to keep Dad company for just a while longer and then they'll come home on the train. Can't wait to go and pick them up and hear all about the trip up and the tunnels from Marcus, he just loves the trains and tunnels around Kaikoura.

I'm working my way through a couple of Eckhart Tolle books right now, have devoured A New Earth and onto it a 2nd time and getting started on the Power of Now too. I love the way he writes, sets it all out very simply and the 'gap in the thoughts' were you can sense a background awareness is exactly like sensing animals when talking to them, except the Awareness/Consciousness (God) doesn't have a personality like the animals do. Very good author if anyone is looking for some holiday reading :o)

Anyway, would just like to take this opportunity to wish you all a very Merry Christmas, a wonderful New Year and some incredible bonding times with your loved ones (animal and not!)

From my tribe to yours, Merry Christmas :o)

catch up time, you first, then me ;o)

Been pretty full on here for the last couple of weeks, a good steady workload to keep me occupied at night is great, some fantastic updates from owners of cats, dogs and horses which is lovely as I know they're all working in a better partnership to get those results :o)

A couple of new additions here, bet you can't guess ;o) Yeah OK the mad chook lady has been collecting again. A beautiful picked on baby who was getting a hiding to the point of her comb being pecked too came and made herself known to me by jumping on me. I made sure she had a feed of pellets and water and tried to take notes of what she looked like so I could keep an eye on her in the shed in future. I got up to shift and she came running after me, being attacked by everything she went past on the way. This happened the entire 3/4 hour I was in the shed. I popped her up on the feeder out of the way while I took the cart and eggs outside to the quad bike and then I went back to get her, she was gone!!!!! I looked everywhere! Disappeared into thin air! I thought to myself that she was not meant to be and went back to the quad bike and Marcus and there she was! Sitting up on the cart waiting for me! I got her home and asked Marcus what he thought her name might be, he said "I think she's Mary"... now Mary is the first ever chook who I was going to take home when the shed was due to "go" unfortunately she died in a 2 week period I was away and only 2 weeks before I could have brought her home with me :o( Broke my heart! Mary would follow me around the shed too and jump on me if another chook came to close to her, jumped onto me head once, I laughed so hard she nearly fell off again! Well this Mary is the same and when I checked with her if she would like Mary as a name she was more than happy with it :o)

28th of November and I found an injured young one, maybe only 8 mths old or there abouts. She'd been scalped, the skin stripped right away showing all the flesh from just behind her comb and bigger than a $2 coin. Her face was swollen and her eyes looked like little beady things (more than normal! LOL) trying to peer out of the swelling. She also had a big hole in her neck about the same size but thankfully all I could see there was blood not a gaping hole like in her head! Anyway I put her in a quiet place on her own and told the owner he'd need to do the deed to her. I came back the next day and he'd forgotten!!! Poor wee darling! However the head wound had dried and the skin had stuck back to the flesh rather than sliding around when she moved, and the swelling on one side had gone down ever do slightly, so I got her some food and water and she ate and drank, so I thought what the hell and told the boss I'd take her home and try to keep the flies away from her!!!

So, she came home on the Monday afternoon. On Tuesday my Father in Law in Christchurch rang to say Petes mum was in hospital and the Doctors had said she had from 2 days to 2 weeks (she had cancer) so Pete was going to head down on Wednesday and Marcus and I would follow on Friday as we were supposed to head down for the weekend anyway. Tuesday morning and dad rings saying the family has been called into the hospital as the time is close! I rang Pete and he headed straight down, just the clothes he was in and Marcus and I would follow on Wednesday morning after sorting out someone to look after the animals.

Mum died at 11.10pm on the Tuesday night, Pete had got there at about 2pm so he was able to be with her and dad when she passed very very peacefully :o)

Now of course I had a scalped chicken to deal with too! I couldn't leave her here so she came with us! Stayed in Dad's fly free laundry and got her head bioptron'd and sprayed daily with colloidal silver, she was a very good girl and altho she talks to you, she is a very quiet talker.

We came home Sunday and she and Mary now share a chook pen all by themselves. Mary is scared of Felicity (Little Flick after the fire engine in the old kids radio story, she loves that song) and Little Flick is not interested in harassing Mary. I think they'll be best buddies very soon :o)

It was Little Flicks first night out of the cage last night and I went out just as it was getting dark to make sure she knew where she could sleep. A hedgehog came under the fence into the pen and Little Flick took the 3 steps needed to have a look at it, it waltzed right up to her legs and stuck his nose into the feathers, not sure if he had a nibble or not, but Flick squawked and jumped away and he followed! They did this about 5 times, hedgie following Flick and going in for a love bite hehehe. I had to nudge him out the way with my foot to get him to leave her alone as he was ignoring my growling and clapping of hands, hope it isn't sick as it was very pale coloured too!

Had to put the girls up on top of Flicks cage in case he came over to eat their pellet and nibbled their toes while he was at it LOL.

Came home from Christchurch after 5 days away and Mac's a bit hoppy, nearly foundered the podge! So I've pulled him out of the dressage on Sunday, mentally he's still not quite right on the mounting part (showed this at a lesson yesterday!) so better to give him the time he needs than rush it and blow it.

He and Smokey got their teeth done today, as suspected Smokey REALLY needed his to be done! Unfortunately the usual dentist we get couldn't come up from Christchurch till after Christmas (and who knew WHEN after Christmas) so I booked in with another one coming up from Christchurch..... I should have asked the price first! Oh My God!!!! That was an expensive exercise! hey, good job but still it wasn't worth what I had to pay for it! Not a pleasant surprise this close to Christmas but at least the boys are done and happy I suppose!

And now of course I'm still playing catch up after being away with work! Never mind, nearly caught up!

There you go! All caught up you are, and I'm nearly caught up and Christmas is just around the corner! EEK!!!!

On a plus side, after Christmas Smokey will be coming back into work! YAY!!!

Interesting shift from animals to Earth...

it seems to be that I'm getting surrounded by clips and reminders about the planet as a whole rather than just animals. Probably started with the subconscious shift from land to sea while thinking about the whales and suddenly I'm more "aware" of things to do with the planet around me.

These have all been shared on the FaceBook page but I have found them important enough to me that I'll share them here too... they are long clips as far as you tube clips go and I know that will put most people off, it certainly put me off when I first got emailed the link to the movie "Home" about a year ago, but after I'd watched the 24 min clip of Kiesha talking about the changes the planet is undergoing, and having a chat myself with the whales consciousness and then the planet, I found that link for the "Home" movie pop up in front of me again and watched it.... WOW!!!! What a great movie, I'm actually watching it again today, the camera work is absolutely AMAZING, the message is timely and although it starts out being one of those heart breaking "what the hell can we do about it?!" things, the movie actually finishes outlining how we as countries and governments ARE changing things for the positive, which makes the whole movie extra special :o)

So, here are the 2 links, again I know most of you won't watch them due to the length of them, but if you're ready to engage with Mother Earth I'm sure you'll find yourself just clicking on them and loving them too :o)

Kiesha from the Tribe of Many Colours speaks in Zurich

"Home" a movie by Yann Arthus-Bertrand

and lastly some "thoughts" I had while driving to Christchurch on Friday just past...

the day I was supposed to be first going to go and see the whales, my oldest bitch Karma asked as I was leaving if I would ask the whales to send her some healing, struck me as odd, but I said OK to her and off I went. Of course the whales weren't about so we didn't go out and when I got home I got a "well?????" as I got in with her. Told her we didn't get to see any.

I'd watched that 20 min clip talking about what we've done to the planet and how it's affecting different species around the world, and of course it mentions the Gulf Oil Spill too... Now ages ago straight after the CHCH earthquake as I was sending some energy to Mother Earth in the Christchurch area it was sucked like a vortex into the Gulf of Mexico instead, like a bottomless pit, didn't think much of it, obviously mother earth decided that was much more necessary for her, so be it.

So today as I got down towards Kaikoura I thought I'd just see what I could pick up from any whale consciousness down there. I simply asked whey they were not around when we'd wanted to see them. Who knows what gave this back to me but I got them out in deep waters doing healing (now I'd never thought of whales as healers before, dolphins yes, but not whales, until Karma had asked for some from them!) and when I asked what for I got the Gulf of Mexico. Got closer in to Kaikoura and looked at the mountains thinking how little we could guess was going wrong around the planet looking at the beauty she still contains on the surface and I did as was asked in that clip. I sent Mother Love and Love for healing. As I was doing this (and you have to remember my head doesn't shut up so I chatter incessantly!) I asked about the earthquakes. Certainly unusual for us as a country to have them ongoing like they are, so I simply asked why they were happening, and I got back quite simply "to move the plates". So of course I asked why they needed to move? and got back the Gulf of Mexico again.

Would love to know a couple of things..... firstly are the whales being seen LESS since the Gulf of Mexico due to them being out deeper doing the healing? and secondly what is happening with the plates here after the quakes, movement, directions etc and how that may (if it is!) be linked to the plates around the Gulf of Mexico.

Was interesting anyway, and a good little bonding session with old Mother Earth :o)