Friday, May 6, 2011

God and I

well, we had a good wee chat last night. The shower is my contemplation space and while I was soaking away my cares I started exploring how I saw the Awareness. (God is much shorter to type, so for the sake of describing the Creative energy, I'm just going to use God in a very non typically religious way ;o) I was for example able to see it in the water, I was able to see it in the glass shower doors and then I stopped to think that it was also in the air that filled the gap between the two things, and that of course, it was in me too. That sense of self put up a bit of a token resistance here, it tried to insert a gap between everything else and 'me' but of course what was the gap? God! My skin wasn't a barrier, it was God too, took a minute or so to work through each resistance the mind brought up, acknowledging each thing it wanted to use as a separation as God anyway. Once that was done it was all different, realising even my ego, my protesting, sense of self was part of that all pervading Energy, no gap between it and God, I gave it back to God, I surrendered it (again!) to the Whole and then finally I saw things as God sees them through my eyes, when God is allowed to observe it's creations through a self aware being, I know I'll never be able to explain it well enough that you can even glimpse what it was like, but I (God) fell in Love with the shower, the water, the heat, the shower wall and me within that, it felt like a little kid had been let into a candy shop and this time instead of God watching 'me' play in this realm of form, I watched God play and it was liberating and blissful and something incredible.

I'm sure considering I surrendered ego to Myself, I'll have to do it a few times till I figure out how this all works better LOL, but that sense of freedom, that depth of Love, so so incredible, once experienced there really is no going back.

'Die before you die' they say and realise there is no fear, no separation... I think I've died and gone to heaven :o)

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